Believers made for church or vice versa?

There’s times when some believers will say, “it feels like we’re only in this church to serve its ministries.” This weightiness of duty grows from the belief that believers are called to tasks and ministries to keep the church alive, as if the church takes precedence over people. But, when church is focused on the edification of believers then the tasks of ministry no longer feel like a burden shouldered for the sake of the church. Instead, ministry is what it is meant to be; believers taking responsibility for the sake of the faith and health of other believers, as John Owen writes:

Let none mistake themselves herein, believers are not made for churches, but churches are appointed for believers. Their edification, their guidance and direction in the profession of the faith and performance of divine worship in assemblies according to the mind of God, is their use and end ; without which they are of no signification. The end of Christ in the constitution of his churches, was not the moulding of his disciples into such ecclesiastical shapes, as might be sub-servient unto the power, interest, advantages, and dignity of them that may in any season come to be over them ; but to constitute a way and order of giving such officers unto them, as might be in all things useful and subservient unto their edification; as is expressly affirmed, Eph. iv. 11 — 14. The church was made for us, not we for the church.

EQ and the wisdom of God

Many churches, it seems to me, believe they are purpose driven, gospel focused and working together for God. In reality, however, they are actually driven by the egos of the individuals in the church. What is lacking is not a grasp of the gospel but a grasp of self. Christians can have low EQ, emotional intelligence, the ability to make sense of our emotions, desires and motivations and those of others.

The reason we lack EQ is because understanding of self is developed through the observation of people, of self and others, including biblical characters, rather than being found explicitly in scripture per se. The bible must be read and applied. We can make bible reading and study as an end in itself without doing this work of applying its teaching to self. Scripture does make sense of why we do things; we are sinners, either under grace or under wrath. Scripture puts our sinful behaviour in the right context of faith in Christ and obedience to him. But, where does scripture succinctly describe my own set of deep, personal motivations? It doesn’t. Scripture leaves it to us to exegete ourselves, finding what really makes me tick by thinking about my feelings and actions. I need to exercise EQ in light of scripture if I am to grow in Christ’s likeness.

For my marriage to work, my family to grow, my church relationships to be more healthy and to be able to connect with unbelievers I need to know myself and them. EQ is described by some as:

1. Self-awareness — the ability to read one’s emotions and recognize their impact.
2. Self-management — involves controlling one’s emotions and impulses and adapting to changing circumstances.
3. Social awareness — the ability to sense, understand, and react to others’ emotions while comprehending social networks.
4. Relationship management — the ability to inspire, influence, and develop others while managing conflict.

I believe that tools like The Myers Briggs Type Indicator, Belbin team roles and other more recent personality profilers help describe what people are like at their core.

My wife and I were introduced to the enneagram just before we were married, and we’ve found it to be a constant source of understanding for why we behave the way we do, partly because of sin and part because that’s the way God wired us together. I am driven my a need to be successful and help whilst my wife by a need to be in control and try new things. Knowing this, we bring the sinful behaviour produced by our core desires under the light of the gospel, putting off the old self and putting on Christ.

I think Proverbs 10:13 gives permission for Christians to use these sorts of extra-biblical tools; “On the lips of him who has understanding, wisdom is found, but a rod is for the back of him who lacks sense.”

Get EQ.

On dealing with a cancer scare

I have not blogged for a week or so having had a cancer scare. It’s been a roller coaster week.

This was my second cancer scare. The first was in 2004, when I was told I had a subcataneous tumour on my nose, which had been growing for almost 4 years. Only after it was removed was I told that it was benign. The second scare, last week, started when I found a ragged black nodular lesion on my side, just above my waist. I had noticed it three months before and dismissed it as tiny blood blister and then I forgot about it. Now it was much bigger, with pink staining around it. I am in the highest risk category for melanoma and so I have always kept a close eye on my skin. My father sadly died in 2005, six years after having one removed from his neck. Photos of this lesion showed that it had all the hallmarks of a nodular melanoma, which is almost incurable once it gets into the blood stream.

I think I dealt with this scare much better than the first and this blog is about what made the difference.

After the discovery, my wife and I lay awake for most of the first night. Lots of things went through our minds, including, why didn’t I get it checked out in October? Why didn’t I watch it and photograph it each month? How would Amanda and the kids cope without me? How would I break the news to my mum, so soon after dad had died from the same disease? What would we do about the new post I was starting in five weeks’ time, as vicar of Holy Trinity?

If found God’s word brought perspective. It turned panic into peace and prayerfulness.

Perspective

Two bible verses helped me put cancer in perspective:

Romans 8:18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Philippians 1:21-24 For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labour for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.

I was crystal clear on this. It is truly better for me to die now and enter eternal life with Christ, but for the sake of Amanda, our children, my wider family and the church it is better that I live. The perspective that this life is short and eternal life is real made a huge difference to the way I viewed death.

Panic into peace

The morning after discovering the lesion I went downstairs for my quiet time. In my bible reading program I came to Psalm 13:

Psalm 13:1-6
How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I take counsel in my soul
and have sorrow in my heart all the day?
Consider and answer me, O LORD my God;
light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death,
lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him,”
lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.
5 But I have trusted in your steadfast love;
my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
I will sing to the LORD,
because he has dealt bountifully with me.

This was a word in season. Not only because the psalmist, David, sings of his fear for his life with deep sorrow, but because he finishes his psalm with his focus on God’s steadfast love and salvation.

That morning, my wife read Psalm 73 in her quiet time:
Psalm 73:23-24 ‘Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterwards you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And on earth there is nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.’

I went to see my GP that morning. She got me onto the melanoma fast-track. I had four days to wait until I saw the dermatologist. As I left the surgery my GP said “fingers crossed”. I said “God has control over the whole universe, even these few cancer cells. I put my trust in him. He knows what he is doing.”

Beside all the anxiety, questions and waiting, we had a sense of calm and peace, because of the promises of God. When we turned the words of these Psalms to prayer, God worked deeply in our hearts to make the promises real and the panic was turned to peace.

It is the waiting and uncertainty which makes one’s mind whizz, but each time I grew anxious I prayed. During one afternoon nap, I turned Psalm 121 over in my mind and prayed it through:

“I lift my eyes to you Lord, because my help comes from you, as you made the heavens and the earth. You don’t sleep whilst you watch over me. Lord, you said that you are the shade at my right hand, so that the sun would not harm me by day, nor the moon by night. And so, dear Lord, as he sun has caused the damage to my skin and you are sovereign over the entire universe, would you graciously and mercifully take control of these few cancer cells and heal them. Have mercy on my family, Amen.”

As I thought that God could do what he said he would do, I left it to him. The next morning the pink area around the site had turned bluish-purple. I was praying lots and kept the prayers mixed between words of assurance and promises of God’s fatherly care. Matthew 6, “Do not be anxious about tomorrow, seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness (who is Jesus Christ, the righteous one [1 Peter 3:18]) and all the rest will fall into place.” Or, in other words, don’t focus on the cancer but on God, and he’ll work the rest out. Over 24 hours, the stain changed colour and faded and the black nodules reduced in size.

I found John Piper’s “Don’t Waste Your Cancer” a helpful reminder of key attitudes and his talk on the economic downturn (see my Vodpod on the right menu) was also really helpful. By the end of 48 hours I had moved through the worst of the anxiety, partly by refusing to accept that my conclusion was right, mostly simply trusting the words above and now it was just a case of waiting to see what was to come.

Prayerfulness and thankfulness

During the next couple of days I would swing from slight anxiety to prayerfulness. Whenever I got anxious I prayed some of the prayers listed above. I knew that whatever happened, God had used the lesion to soften my heart and to bring Christ into really sharp focus, and so I was very thankful. There was more tenderness in our family, more concern for those who don’t know Christ and my conscience was softer. Above all, I found my dependence on Christ, my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, increased and I knew he died for sin to make me right with God.

More perspective

Paul describes the Christian life as a marathon of endurance. I found that though I could survive at that level of spiritual sensitivity for long, I was left to wonder if I had really just been plodding along.

By the time I saw the dermatologist on the Melanoma Fast-Track program, four days after my first appointment with the GP, the lesion had shrunk and my photos provided evidence that this was probably some sort of benign hemasomething. I was very relieved but also very thankful to God for being put through the scare, as I had been drawn closer to Christ as a result of thinking I’d die.

It is a good thing to live life thinking that the end of life is nearer than we assume. I am left wondering if our reliance on modern medicine and the way we have largely hidden death from view dulls our senses and causes us to plod along with or without Christ.

How the cross heals

“Healing ministry” has become a popular aspect of church services, largely in charismatic churches, but not confined to that constituency. I have no doubts that God heals people of physical sickness, gradually and instantly and that we should pray for God to act when someone is ill. It’s obvious, too, that Jesus uses miracles to validate the authority of his word (Mark 2:1ff, John 11:1ff). In this quote from the 5th chapter of God’s Way of Holiness, Horatius Bonar shows how the cross has the power to heal. It is the cross, therefore, that our healing ministries should ultimately point to:

it is by the abundance of that peace and truth, revealed to us in the cross, that our cure is wrought.

The cure is not perfected in an hour. But, as the sight of the cross begins it, so does it complete it at last. The pulses of new health now beat in all our veins. Our whole being recognizes the potency of the divine medicine, and our diseases yield to it.

Yes, the cross heals. It possesses the double virtue of killing sin and quickening holiness. It makes all the fruits of the flesh to wither, while it cherishes and ripens the fruit of the Spirit, which is “love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance” (Gal 5:22). By this the hurt of the soul is not “healed slightly,” but truly and thoroughly. It acts like the fresh balm of southern air to one whose constitution the frost and damp of the far north had undermined. It gives new tone and energy to our faculties, a new bent and aim to all our purposes, and a new elevation to all our hopes and longings. It gives the death-blow to self, it mortifies our members which are upon the earth. It crucifies the flesh with its affections and lusts. Thus, looking continually to the cross, each day, as at the first, we are made sensible of the restoration of our soul’s health; evil loosens its hold, while good strengthens and ripens.

Don’t confuse the old and new man

One of the central tenets of Christian counselling is the putting off of the old self and putting on of the new (Ephesians 4:22-24). Most of our behavioural failures stem from the old self, with its ingrained patterns of sin. Recognising these patterns and dealing with them is essential for healthy, godly lives and relationships.

The struggle to continue to grow in the likeness of the new self beyond what seems to be a natural limit is also one of the chief problems with Christians who hold a neonomian doctrine, the mixing of justification and sanctification. The process of putting off the old is rapid for many new Christians but becomes increasingly difficult as we achieve a greater refinement of character. Slip ups, backsliding and new patterns of sin which appear at different times and for varying periods can produce a great sadness and lack of assurance for neonomians.

Hoatius Bonar helpfully clarifies the distinction between the old man and the new based on Romans 7. It is not that the old and new are two persons, as we are each only one person, but that each believer has both a legal condition and a moral state:

This mysticism as to the old and new man proceeds on a confusion similar to that which mixes up justification and sanctification. The “old man,” in the apostle’s figure, evidently means sometimes our former legal condition, and at other times our former moral state. In the first sense, the old man is “crucified,” put off” once for all, in believing, when we cease to have “confidence in the flesh” (Phil 3:3). Thus far it is true that it is not amended, but set aside entirely. In the second sense, there is a daily putting off what is old, and putting on what is new. It is like our putting on Christ, which is done once for all at justification, but also gradually, in the process of renewing, so that in one place we read, “Ye.. have put on Christ” (Gal 3:27), and in another, “Put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ” (Rom 13:14). The mixture of these two things is the chief source of the errors we have been exposing.

For further notes on this subject see my post called spot the difference?

How liberalism destroyed true liberty

Last week I took my kids to their swimming lessons at a local secondary school. I didn’t notice as we left that my daughter had emerged from the girls changing room without her swimming gear and cardigan. The next morning we discovered what we’d done, so I drove my daughter back to the “big school”.

The entrance to the pool is through the school’s reception. The door is guarded by a secretary behind a glass screen. If she gives you permission to enter, she pushes a button and a magnet releases the door. School kids were streaming through the door and, as I knew where I was going and explained to the receptionist why I’d brought my daughter up, I expected to be told to pop through so she could go in and get her stuff. “You can’t go in to school now, because the kids are in, I’ll get the caretaker to fetch your stuff.” So we waited whilst she made a phone call to pester someone to check if our stuff was there and a friendly lady came out with the stuff, only adding to our embarrassment in front of giggling school kids.

Why were we not allowed to pop in? It’s because liberalism has destroyed true liberty. Everyone is assumed to be a potential danger because it is assumed that no-one keeps the law. The irony is that liberalism was, in part, a movement against the cold and restrictive moralism of the 1950s and yet the 60s love generation have destroyed true liberty by seeking to express love without constraint.

That’s why I love the end of Horatius Bonar’s chapter on the Saint and the Law in God’s Way of Holiness. Bonar first makes it clear that the law does not justify, and so for their justification believers are not under the law, but under grace through faith in Christ crucified. Yet, the law is liberty when believers obey it:

Say what men will, obedience to law is liberty, compliance with law is harmony, not discord. The force of law does not need always to be felt, but its object, whether felt or unfelt, is to keep everything in its proper place, and moving in its proper course; so that one man’s liberty may not interfere with another man’s, but each have the greatest amount of actual freedom which creaturehood is capable of, without harm to itself or others. Law does not interfere with true liberty, but only with that which is untrue, promoting and directing the former, discouraging only the latter.

As with the orbs of heaven, so with us. Obedience to their ordered courses is not simply a necessity of their being, but of their liberty. Let them snap their cords, and choose for themselves the unfettered range of space; then not only is order gone, and harmony gone, and beauty gone, but liberty is gone; for that which keeps them in freedom is obedience to the forces of their constitution, and non-departure from their appointed orbits. Disobedience to these, departure from these, would bring about immediate collision of star with star, the stoppage of their happy motions, the extinction of their joyful light, havoc and death, star heaped on star in universal wreck.

Endnote: The last paragraph is a great illustration and lesson to preachers to use word pictures.

Robo on a life worthy of your calling

I have taken the following quotes from James Robson’s Facebook status on Saturday. The Facebook status is temporary but these quotes are worth preserving. James set the quotes in the context of a life worthy of the calling we’ve received (Ephesians 4:1-3), which is not task orientated but centred on personal godliness and character.

I came across this later in the day – a quotation from Jeremy Taylor’s On Liberty (1646):

‘Many mischiefs proceed not from this, that all men are not of one mind, for that is neither necessary nor possible, but that every opinion is made an article of faith, every article is the ground of a quarrel, every quarrel makes a faction, every faction is zealous, and all zeal pretends for God, and whatsoever is for God cannot be too much. We by this time are come to that pass, where we think we love not God except we hate our brother, and we have not religion except we persecute all but our own.’

Ouch!

And from a sermon of his, “Let no man pull down the ministry of another – for if you can only make yourself look big by pulling another down, you must be a dwarf!”

I found this really helpful, as it ties the start of Ephesians 4 to the end of the chapter. If Christians are not engaged in building others up according to their needs, then their words can only tear others down.

Good grieving guide (part 4)

Never being one to worry much about the future, I had not considered anxiety to be an ingredient of grief before being asked to speak on Matthew 6:25-34, “Do not worry about tomorrow”, at a funeral recently.

When someone close to us dies, someone we loved and still love, we experience a concoction of emotions which someone unhelpfully called grief. Grief can be a mixture of loss, despair, anger, guilt, shame, broken-heartedness and anxiety. And everyone who grieves experiences some or all of these emotions to a greater or lesser extent. I’ve written on first of these emotions in the good grieving guide parts 1, 2 and 3.

In Matthew 6, Jesus deals with our sense of anxiety. It is easy, so easy to be anxious at the time of the death of a loved one. The cause of their death can cause anxiety for us. Where an illness has a genetic link, like some cancers or coronary diseases, children of the deceased can be concerned about their own health and mortality. Sudden accidents can make us anxious about putting ourselves in similar situations, like flying or even driving. It is not selfish to think about ourselves at this time, it’s only natural. And so, the death of a loved one can be a time of anxiety about our own mortality.

It can also be a time of anxiety for the adjustments which must be made in life. “How will I cope without mum?”, “What are we going to do without her?” or “life will never be the same again.”

Jesus speaks directly into our situation. His words are words of assurance for believers. As Jesus assures his followers they know they need not worry. Jesus says “do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on.”

Not worrying is easier said than done, why shouldn’t we worry? Because, says Jesus, God is in control and knows what he is doing. Look at how the birds live, look at how beautiful the flowers are. God feeds them and makes them beautiful, they all live and die, and God will do much more for you, because you are much worth more to him. God looks after his creation, and especially people.

And so Jesus teaches his followers that if they are anxious, this is a symptom of a lack of faith. He asks them, “will God not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?” And so if you find today that this is a day of anxiety, worry about the future and anxiety and concern about your own mortality then listen again to some of the most comforting words of the Lord Jesus:

“seek first the kingdom of God
and his righteousness,
and all these things will be added to you.
34 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow

Seeking the kingdom of God and his righteousness leads people to find the Son of God, Jesus Christ, the righteous one. Through faith in him the Apostle Paul asks “He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? (Romans 8:32). Through faith in Christ as Saviour from sin and as the way to eternal life, anxiety ceases as nothing can happen which will take away what he has secured for those who love him.

Why I don’t wear a dog collar (part 1)

I was on a post-funeral visit last week and had really helpful conversation about the state of the church in England. During the discussion the subject of dog collars came up, because I wasn’t wearing one and don’t wear one except for funeral services where the family requests it.

My reasons for not wearing one up to now have related largely to fashion. Dog collars became fashionable at the end of the 19th century and, as my wife says, I look like a pratt in a collar, a pea on a stick. Collars also create an unhelpful distinction between clergy and other church members, but I am not ontologically superior to the unordained and a badge helps identify me to outsiders just as well. For evangelism, I can’t be all things to all people for the sake of the gospel if I wear a collar, as it creates deference in many people and guards are kept up.

When I said at the visit that I don’t wear a dog collar, the reply was “you’re quite right because when people see a priest or vicar in the street, the first thing which comes into their mind is “I don’t think I can trust him, he’s probably a paedophile.””

If the dog collar has come to symbolise immorality it is time to get rid of it as part of a necessary rebranding of the clergy.

The shorthand of “the gospel” or “the cross”?

When using shorthand for what Christians believe in, do evangelicals speak more about “the gospel” or “the cross”? It might just be the way I hear things, but I think we mostly use “gospel” as shorthand.

I am going to try to use “the cross” whenever I would normally say “the gospel”. “The cross” is what Jesus did for sinners, “the gospel” says nothing about the actions of Christ. “The gospel” cloaks and conceals the wonder of the cross in jargon. “The cross” causes offence, “the gospel” doesn’t because it says nothing, it needs explanation. “The cross” is the gospel and the power of God for salvation.

For Christ did not send me to baptize but to preach the gospel, and not with words of eloquent wisdom, lest the cross of Christ be emptied of its power. 18 For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. (1 Corinthians 1:17-18 )