I’ve had a few scary lumps, bumps and moles in the last ten years (see on dealing with a cancer scare). They crop up once every three or four years. These skin leisons are the sort that, on first sight, make doctors take a sharp intake of breath. Each time this has happened I’ve thought “that looks dodgy” and then at various points in the process of investigation my mind churns out frightening thoughts like “how will my kids cope without their dad?”
Here’s how it unfolded. At the end of November, I noticed a mole changing shape, decided to watch it and then by mid-December decided to go to my GP. I got an appointment for 3rd Jan and then was fast tracked for the skin cancer clinic. That week between GP and dermatologist I had a bad dose of January blues and in my “I can’t face the term ahead” mood I looked up amelanotic melanoma images on Google. I am an idiot.
It turns out that amelanoic melanomas (which killed my dad) and fungal infections look the same to non-medics like me.
I am grateful for the scare I gave myself because each time I have lived through a scary skin lesion I have learned a valuable lesson. This time it was “trust me, says the Lord, and don’t worry about tomorrow.”
“Trust me”, says the Lord, “with life, death and your family.” And “who by worrying can add a single hour to his life.” My days are numbered by the Lord, and worrying about when the day and hour will come won’t change it. If my skin does go malignant and I face death by cancer, then the Lord knows what he is doing and why. I’d also be happy not to have too many of these scares.